At 34 years old, I found myself jobless and living with my parents. From the outside, it easily looked like another failure to launch story. But really it was a third-life crisis story.
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One glimpse of the work and the frustration we’ll go through to bring our idea into the world, and it’s enough to make us not want to do it. To put it aside for another day. To save it for later.
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Perhaps what life is really trying to show us – through all the plot twists and turns – is how to heal ourselves.
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Maybe that’s ultimately what life is trying to teach us – that it isn’t about living our best-laid plans. Maybe through all its twists and turns, life’s main goal is to actually free us from them.
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Maybe moving on isn’t about never looking back, but instead seeing our life as a continuous path. Each step – whether it be forward, sideways, or backwards – was still a step we had to take to progress. There are no deviations.
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Perhaps it isn’t about doing things despite our fear... but rather doing things with our fear. And only then can we set it free… as opposed to suppressing it, only to have it return with a vengeance.
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This concept that our relationships are a reflection of what’s going on inside us is not new to me. I’ve heard it before. But something about hearing it that morning was different.
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Change is a part of life. Whether it is change we are pursuing, change we never expected, or change that was always inevitable, it is going to happen. And so is the discomfort that comes along with it. All we can really control is how we approach it.
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As a goal-oriented person – in sex and in life – this is a hard concept to wrap my brain around. It seems counter intuitive. Why would I not focus on finishing?
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